She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Randomize
