I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
