It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Randomize