Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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