we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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