These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
