your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize