no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize