I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I just blew my weed a kiss
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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