That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
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come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
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Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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