is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
