He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
