like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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