Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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