Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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