i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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