Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?