Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Hippo gnu deer
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize