So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
