Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
