don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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