i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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