Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
