dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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