I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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