Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
