Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Randomize