So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
