So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
