How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
