using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize