I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
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