I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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