She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
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