No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Randomize
