Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
and you fell through a lawn chair
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
