she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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