I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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