It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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