remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Randomize