I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Randomize
