you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
