ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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