"it" just moved
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
