Rock
Scissors
Fuck
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
