Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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