i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I think I just sharted jello shots
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