You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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