all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
