I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
