worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
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