i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
